Since System Of A Down is currently on the road, I sent my questions through Velvet Hammer and Serj was cool enough to take them on, and get back to me with a few choice answers. Although he drips with sarcasm, the expected eccentricity, and a dry sense of humor, I’d say his to-the-point answers were pretty thought provoking. Here they are..
What makes you want to get up every morning?
I guess that would be my inner vision guiding me to take on another earth day.
How do you overcome it when you get a dead audience?
Nothing to overcome; to assume everyone should be ecstatic about SOAD is to assume that we’ve discovered a cure or something, I have a good time anyway, I may tease them or laugh at them a bit just for fun.
What are your biggest influences outside of music? (Politics, fashion, celebrities..)
Literary writers, dark comics, poetry, liberal historians, and such.
What do you most want to be remembered for?
I want to be remembered no more and no less than a tree on the side of the road.
If you weren’t playing music, how do you think you’d get your message out there?
With books, internet, poetry, etc.
Are you all close with your families?
Are they supportive of what you do?
Do any of your family members attend your shows?
Have you ever toured with a band you couldn’t get along with and if you have, how did you handle it?
By getting along…
Describe your worst live concert experience.
Poland playing between a local favorite death metal band and Slayer, pretty tough, it made men out of us as far as performers.
If you could play for an audience of any 3 really important or influential people, who would they be?
Who is to say who is important or influential and in what way ? I would like to play to 3 infants under the age of 3 who could probably perceive us for what we are without any biases developed over age and time.
Who would you most like to tour with that you haven’t already toured with?
Too many to mention
Who have you been able to meet that you’ve always admired as a result of being in System of a Down?
Many people including Mike Patton, Slayer, Primus, the Deftones, David Barsamian wrote me a letter back (head of public radio in Colorado, I think), and you.
(Somehow, I think he’s being sarcastic here. Don’t you?)
What is the weirdest item a fan has ever sent to any of the band members?
We had to sign a pee cup once, I think.
Any bands you’d like to plug?
Orally or anally ?
(Too bad Serj and I weren’t doing a phone interview. I would have loved to answer that one for him…)
How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop?
I don’t know but you could ring my balls, balls, balls, ring my balls, my balls, ringaling a ling a ling a.
Are any of the band members married, kids?
We are all kids.
When does a musician reach the point when they are too old to play anymore?
Way after they stop breathing in this fleshly state.
What do you have to say to the Los Angeles/Hollywood System fans that support you so heavily?
What is your plan for world domination?
The mere fact that you would ask the question makes me feel like you have some dream of it yourself, so why don’t you tell me? I would be happy to live in concert with our environment physically and spiritually.
Thanks a lot, Serj…